Slowly (Oh so slowly)

We stay because we don't know where else to go.


Then there's the two
of us. This word
is far too short for us, it has only
four letters, too sparse
to fill those deep bare
vacuums between the stars
that press on us with their deafness.
It's not love we don't wish
to fall into, but that fear.
This word is not enough but it will
have to do. It's a single
vowel in this metallic
silence, a mouth that says
O again and again in wonder
and pain, a breath, a finger
grip on a cliffside. You can
hold on or let go.

You were like a walking compliment.

(please view large)

I hardly write anymore. I go through phases and periods of intense thoughts that I feel obligated to write down, however lately it's been the opposite. My mind is this empty cave of confusion and dark thoughts. I've become rigid and frozen. I've forgotten how to be alone with my thoughts, let alone explain what is racing through my mind. I've somehow let these fears and anxieties of mine overtake my life. I'm strong enough to overcome this, I'm sure I am. Yet, I haven't found the inspiration I so desperately need to push myself, and I doubt it's going to appear miraculously however much I wish. It's not all bad, but that's all my mind seems to focus on, despite my valiant efforts. Every moment I spend in the sunshine I feel myself unraveling. How much longer will I have to wait for complete and utter tranquility?